on my mind.

current things on my mind before i go to sleep:

1 : so most of my best friends here are leaving after the first semester. i just found out about them all on the same day, save for Justin, whom i was preparing to lose already.

Justin is a shiny soul, he's someone that cant be replaced so easily, i dont think ever. ive never really met anyone like him who can be so optimistic, almost blindly. but its so refreshing, he is like a fresh breath of air, and is always genki. some of the best adventures i've had in japan have been with and because of him. he's always our planner, deciding what to do for us, so we just follow along and are always splendidly surprized. everytime i do my nails i scratch his head because he has puppy-hair, and its funny when he leans into it, even miud-conversation. i love making jokes around him, or telling him something and it takes him a second then he says "oh wait what was that?" as if his head is always in the clouds, or in some distant happy-land filled with ponies and rainbows. and waffles. i think it's adorable how he runs up to A.J. when they are reunited after maybe an hour of being apart, Justin is just so special. sometimes he says something at random, like when he told sensei he wanted her life in japanese. the look on Ikeda-Sensei's face was priceless. as Jaqui and i had to try and explain what Justin had said, he just sat there smiling. i dont know if he puts on an act sometimes, so we just think he doesnt get things, or not, but Justin, you will sorely be missed.

Mat, i was introduced to Mat by Jacob, and he quickly became someone i cared about. firstly it was nice to meet someone who shared similair understandings of life and the world. it was aawesome to talk about anime, and being republican in the same sentance. he's a good concience for anyone, even though he makes some of the meanest jokes you'd never expect out of a church-goer. he oft tells Te, the chinese girl in our class, that he hates her. because japanese has kanji, and the counting system because of the chinese. Mat is one of those guys that has a pretty face, and a really great personality that will find a good job, marry a beautiful woman and have a happy family that sticks together through the roughest of times. he will be a good friend to all those around him, and his kids will brag about how their dad can "beat your dad up".

Alex started out a shy guy, i didnt think we'd ever hang out, nor did i ever think i could miss him so much in his absence. it's been very interesting to see him come out of his shell more and more, and now its to the point that he just makes synical jokes which seemingly come from thin air.
Lindsey : "it's all your fault Alex!! your faaaace!"
Alex : "i'm sorry my mom just doesnt make good babies"
Alex has become a person that i dont ever want to be without, he's the guy that usually doesnt say much in the group, but when he does its sooo funny. he makes great facial expressions and i will always remember when i got to draw the curly mustache on his face for Halloween, it was so suiting. he's the kind of guy that you know has a deep personality that just takes time to unearth. and now that i have i dont want to see him go.

Jacob was a surprize. i knew Justin was leaving, and i was pretty sure that Obirin would allow Mat and Alex to stay, but Jacob was supposed to be here for a year, its just that he lacks the funds to do so, and america's economy sucks. *ahem*OBAMA*ahem* Jacob was probably the best friend i've had in a long time, at the beginning of the semester we always hung out. it's especially funny because one of the first things he asked me was if i watched "The Office" and all i could think of was how much he reminded me of Kevin. what's awesome about Jacob is he still has this huuuuge inner child in him, but if he has to he does have a great deal more wisdom to him then he lets on, or even knows. i think Jacob has alot of inner quarrels but if he can get over them, he will definately be able to overcome anything and do what he wants. all it takes is the will to want something, then you never give up until you get it. and if you fail, you learn from your mistakes and try again. i feel bad i never finished pokemon with him, but it was so cute that he was entirely addicted to the game. for the rest of my life whenever i see something pokemon (which will be forever, since the damn thing will never end) i will think of the big guy who thinks he's a walrus.

i really dont know how to deal with losing these people yet, i'm generally an untrusting-rather cold bitch in america. i just dont like people. i grew sick of so many shallow shells that i forgot that individuals exsisted. and now that i've been reminded and am looking to the future and when i see them gone, it really slices a piece out of me. being in japan has made me feel alive in some ways i havent for a long time. socially, primarily. but, even when the time comes i wont be saying "farewell". i've learned in my life that most people forget you when they're gone. i've been forgotten by many of my friends in my life, and i've come to accept this fate. when Justin, Mat, Alex and Jacob go home, they'll return to their normal lives, their families and friends. and they may stay in contact with some of us through facebook, but eventually it will fade. which is normal. the diference between them and me, is that this, now, is my normal life. and i will never forget a one of them.

2 : it's cold.

3 : it's very hard to type with these long friggin nails, this thing would normally only take like 7 mins to type but its gone on about 25 now. -_____-;;

4 : i miss David so much... i really hope law school isnt destroying him, and i know he's doing well on his exams. i have so muh faith in him, something ive never had in anything else in my life. not to this extent. i cant wait to see him for christmas, its the best present i could recieve. the only thing better would be if he tied a red ribbon around his neck when i pick him up at Narita, because that'd just be hillarious.

5 : Kaede sounds funny when shes trying to brush her teeth.

6 : Taco is a strange turtle... he still hasnt seemed to have eaten anything, and i cant figure nout his temperature settings. he gets hot and goes in the water when its cold in the room, and he gets cold and stands on the rock under the light when its hot. i try to take care of him but i dont know what the hell he wants. the lil prick.

taco

let me first tell the story about my baby turtle.

so... Saturday i went to Yokohama with A.J, Justin, Alex, and Sakana for a festival. we didnt know what the festival was for, we never know what happens at any given place that the japanese take us. they cant answer questions. when you ask something like, "oh, so what's at this festival?" they tilt their head and give you a look that you'd expect from a newborn who spotted a shiny object. we ask "is there food?" they respond quickly "oh yes!" we think, "oh, so they understand, maybe now they know what we're trying to get at." so we ask again, "what else is at this festival?" and we get the same doe-eyed response.

once we got to the festival, it pretty much was just food. and expensive at that. i bought a waffle full of chocolate pudding first, which was amazings. then Justin bought a steak-on-a-stick as A.J. and i eyeball the "furanku furatas" and wonder if they taste anything like a hot dog. i eventually buy one that has an omellete-like wrapping,. and alternating mayo to ketchup. it was delicious. and five dollars. we pass by many stands selling golden shiny obects on sticks and the japanese students cant really explain what they're for, but we know that they're expensive, and that after a year they will be burned. probably for goodluck or a wish or something of the sort. some had bells....

we buy more food, and then i see it again. the "Giant Tub of Tiny Baby Turtles Swimming for Their Lives Away from Waffle Bowls on Sticks" and my heart melts. i ask if anyone wants a baby turtle, no one does. but omg i wanna try to catch one, because apparently the japanese think that it's hard. and i catch like 4 right off the bat but i did it hastily since i only wanted to keep *one*, and so i only got to keep one. you have to catch 3 to keep 1, 6 to keep 2. so i was glad i broke my waffle-bowl-on-a-stick. so the vendor puts it in a bag, and for the rest of the day, random japanese people will come up to me and tell me "oh how cute!" and "wow!" (in japanese though, of course). i worry about carrying the tiny bag for the first ten minutes until i spot an strawberry-on-stick dip-in-chocolate stand. so i get strawberries on a stick that you get to stick in a chocolate fountain. omdfaoisfoasdf amazing. but while i stuffed my mouth, i asked A.J to hold my turtle. they tell me to name him "Noodle" but i decline. and apparently, in A.J.'s hands is when turtle decides to play dead for the first time. he does this also, when Alex holds him, and then later Me. my turtle is very good at playing dead, and scaring the living daylights out of the foreign students, but eventually, exhausted and dying, i make it home with the baby turtle and some turtle food, toss him (gently) into a plastic thing, pour in some water, and drop the rock i found on the road walking home, feed him, then pass out.

Day One With Turtle

i wake up the next morning, and all he seems to want to do is this >>>
which, he does very well. i've concluded that turtle can do tricks. he can ;

Play Dead
Hide In Shell
Flinch
(and my favourite...)
Stare At Vera As She Sleeps Until She Rolls Over

he also is apparently on a diet, since he hasn't taken any of the food i gave him yet. so i worry, since all he does is sit on the rock, that he's cold. and i read online that they usually require Heat Lamps and carry Salmonilla, so i cant play with him like i once thought i could, as i gazed at him through a plastic baggie full of water that had touched hundreds of baby turtles, just like him. so i turn on my lamp, which, when turned onto *bright* (it has a brightness knobbie thing) creates quite a bit of heat. and then i left it on until i went to bed.


Day Two With Turtle

so it was Monday, and i had school. so i left the light on for him and left for school. i also fed him and changed the water. i had a decent day at school, especially when Linguistics was cancelled *angels sing* but i wasnt prepared for what i found when i got home.

now, i clean my room weekly, sometimes bi-weekly. but this is japan and there isnt room for anything, so my room gets pretty messy after a day or two. and i havent had time to clean for a week or so, so you can picture the state of my room at this very moment. (which makes me think, wow, i could be cleaning it right now instead of typing this long and boring story...)

nevertheless, i come home, set down my things, and look at turtle (who is still un-named at this time) who is no longer in his plastic box. the look of fear on my face is something i wish i had eyes on my fingertips like in Beatlejuice so that i could point them at my face and see my own astonishment. i think i stood there for a good 10 seconds before the shock settled and i began my search. there were so many hiding places on the floor, and a shapely rug, that i quickly threw everything i could onto my bed, without moving from my current position. (which isnt hard considering my room is maybe 6'x12' in its entirety, however, it still looked like a lonely game of Twister) after that was taken care of, i searched my messy desk, which would be his first landing point. and since it was practically full as well, there were only two routes he could have taken. so i check the one to the left first, which is by the trash can and also the messiest side of the table. i carefully lift things, including my rug, hoping i dont step on the 2.5" long shelled reptile.. which i dont. because i cant FIND him. i search and search and then i realize there was a second route. i followed it, and casting aside my snot-rags from my battle against influenza, i find him, huddled in a corner near my bed. "AHA!~" i yell, then i pick his ass up and toss him in the water. he *plops* hard enough to create bubbles, and then i begin my search for a deeper container. i swear at the baby turtle as i am searching throuhg my things for potential Turtle Homes. i had a clear plastic-bag... but i didnt want to get it all turtle-yucky. then i think about emptying one of my host families tiny plastic boxes that was left in my room, but where would i pur the wires? then, i find the perfect host for my Turtle-Punishment. the case from the creepy-solar-powered-head-bobbly-toy i got for a birthday gift from my host family's apartment friends. i tear the plastic off that sucker, which must have been about 7' deep, and literally pour turtle into the new vat. i know he needs more space, but he needs to learn a lesson, and i have to remember to go to the hyaku-en store. i tell him that he doesnt deserve a name yet, and that because of his actions he could go to bed without dinner.


Day Three With Turtle

i've been battling with different name ideas for turtle. i usually like food names, so i thought of Melon (but pronounced mheron, since in im japan). i was told to name him after one of the Ninja Turtles, but i figured that was too cliche. then, when i began to type this entry out the name Tasuki popped into my head. which would be an amazing name, considering Tasuki is a sexy fireweilding fighter in Fushigi Yuugi. but i want turtle to have a cute name. so that when i curse at him, it sounds horrendous.

and then i return to the food. because all pets should be named after food.

and i've now decided on Taco. because taco's are funny and why would you name a turtle after mexican food? do they even have turtles in mexico?